Tuesday, April 12, 2005


I’ve placed so many lines recently. I’ve been pondering a career in plumbing. My rotation in critical care medicine is an experience in artificial life. The supplementation of life and energy to those condemned to die. This is a chance at recovery that was never available before, most of these people would have been long gone. Some may walk out of here now and some may leave here in a stretcher. Any which way, I still haven’t met a human being who told me to let him die.

The machines can be intimidating. I Tired of machinery. Ventilators, monitors, dialysis machines, techs, and nurses all grab for my attention at once, all of them demand it. The machine screams, apnea, cardiac arrest, false alert, defibrillate, stop this at once. Do they take out the garbage too? Yes?

My patient couldn’t breath I put a breathing tube in their throat. They can’t pee I place a line in a bladder, can’t crap I have a tube for that. I have a tube for medications and one to monitor blood pressure too. Stick a line in their nose that goes down to their stomachs. So many lines. And now they are on-LINE. All in my blog and my mentality and my dreams and my life. It’s all one, one translucent halogen life. It is taking its toll.

The Medical Intensive Care Unit